“It’s only money.” I have to keep telling myself that. I preach those words to myself when I frustratingly lose money, and I preach them again when I unexpectedly gain it.

Money is just that—money. It’s not my king; it doesn’t control me (unless I let it). It’s not my source of life or joy (unless I give it that power). And it’s not as scary as I think it is (unless I choose to live in fear of it).

What kind of worth do you ascribe to money? Does it consume your thoughts, or drive your every decision? Do you fear life without it? And, when you earn it, do you fear losing it?

I grew up poor, but with loving, frugal parents who didn’t place much importance on money. Character, humility, and kindness were valued more than the almighty dollar. Debt was discouraged, and I was taught to live below my means. I’m grateful for those subtle lessons, but even with that foundation, I still struggle with money anxiety.

My first full-time job paid $29,100 per year, and that was later reduced to $21,825 while we were supporting a family of four. We were under the federal poverty line and eligible for food stamps, though we didn’t use them. Our budget was tight, and that financial strain eventually led me to search for a higher-paying job.

As my income has grown over the years, I’ve wrestled with not becoming obsessed with it. I didn’t have very much money growing up, or in the early years of marriage, and now that I have money saved up, I fear losing it. Being a saver, it’s hard to part with what I’ve worked to save.

But here’s what I’ve learned…

Money will come and go—don’t get too attached. You’ll make mistakes, and money will leave, but that’s okay; you can always make more. It’s only money.

Money can gain a strange hold on our lives, making us act irrationally or worry incessantly over simple problems. It can deceive us into seeing it as a savior from sadness or a measure of social status.

When it comes to spending, we often buy whatever we like, neglecting our emergency fund. When investing, fear drives us to buy high and sell low. These aren’t logical decisions; they’re emotional.

We need to put money in its place. Don’t let it control you, and don’t be afraid of it. Learn the basics of personal finance, free yourself from the anxiety it can cause, and see money for what it truly is. It’s only money.

How do you view money? Are you letting it control you, or are you learning to see it as a tool to build your life and serve others?